Fawlty Towers – January 2019

‘There was a suspicion of nerdiness at this hotel. All but one of the staff were foreign, which is fine by us, but that is all the more reason to have them trained. Nor is their English necessarily good enough; even the woman to whom I paid the bill when we signed out did not understand some words. When I booked a month earlier, I asked to have an e-mail in confirmation. I was told that it was not needed. When we arrived there was no note of our booking. So we had a choice of two unoccupied rooms. We chose one upstairs, which was on the small side, quite comfortable, but the shower did not work well as the shower head had not been cleaned. The stairs were narrow, but no one offered to take our cases up.’

‘Our bedroom had a pleasing colour scheme but was too small for two bedside tables. Not good for the bookworm. For my wife, who has a good nose, the kitchen smells were obvious. The bathroom had no ventilation, no mirror lights, and a window that could not be opened without falling shuts again.’

‘One couple were concluding their meal when we arrived at 8pm. We had been left unattended at the bar, despite being given menus and a wine list, the waiter being more concerned with social chat to a couple of non-residents. Eventually, we gave up and went directly to the dining room, where I protested to a youngish, willing, but not perceptive manager. Complimentary glasses of white wine were given as a result of my complaint. Breakfast was taken in a cool dining room to the backing of taped music from some wretched pianist and guitarist who should have chosen a different career. A dull buffet, save for some smooth fruit yogurt. Excellent bacon, but bland scrambled egg. Brusque service.’